I'll reply your letter

I just read Guofeng's blog. Welcome back bro. It's just great to know that someone had the opportunity to catch a glimpse of Europe. I've had my fair share of Asia but I swear, everytime I get the opportunity to put myself on another God created land, I feel surreal, that I managed to succumb to this 'I am poor and i don't think i can afford the time' mentality.

It is true. Ever since young, life has always about me telling myself, 'Jamiel, if this is what you want, you go get it, but never ask for any money from anybody'. Others are lucky to receive support and grab that experience earlier than others. I guess plenty have had this debate before where one would say, earning your money and spending it would be much better than getting it straight from your parent's pocket. Hello, wake up. I don't mind having an epiphany later in life after enjoying all that. Realizing that it is better to earn and spend your own money without parental support could always wait. Why not, since you're already in that position, make good use of it. I call that fate and luck. We can't complain our current position but we can certainly change them if we want to.

For me, money has always been an issue that I really hate to talk about. Because of insufficient money, I thought twice about sending Attan to the hospital. I didn't have enough savings. Because of insufficient money, I had to slog my way to fund my Thai trip. The opportunity cost? Time with family. Because of insufficient money, I had to pay for my family's outstanding bills at the expense of my own savings to fund my Jakarta endeavour. I don't eat much. I am very prudent on spending. Whenever I see something nice, I'll tell myself, if I don't need it now, don't buy. It would be great though, not to think about money, even when you feel like eating something nice for a change. But I can't help it, it's a survival mentality that has always stuck on me since a kid. If you can't afford, don't buy and don't borrow. Experience taught me that.

I am giving myself 4 more months to save up with hope that Jakarta gives me the green light and I could already leave Singapore. I hope I could save enough at the end of the year to survive in Jakarta. If not, I am going to face another challenge. I hope I don't get lost if I work as a taxi driver.

jamiel
i really miss Attan so much

Lecture me

So what's new for most? Going to school and attending lectures? BORINGG!!! If the lecturer can't entertain me, I find ways to entertain myself. Things that I've done from the Old Bukit Timah Campus to the new one.

- made breakfast for myself. took out my loaf of bread, peanut butter and spoon in front of the prof and whipped myself a great meal.

- slept in front of class

- slept at the back of the class

- slept below the back of the class on the floor

- went out and slept in an empty gsr

- went out of the class and had breakfast at the Botanical Gardens. fed the ducks.

- msn (normal stuff)

- blog

- look out for the hot chickies in class, if there ain't any, I imagine there's one

jamiel
i need a controversy

Bang bang

I'll be away for reservist. EVERYBODY SING THE NATIONAL ANTHEM!!!!

jamiel
penat

Coins

Brocollis are evil. They should disappear from the face of this earth.

jamiel
hate hypocrites

Come on Jamiel

I am desperately in need of inspirations. I need to write. I'm a lil down but I still need to drag myself forward, even if it is just a few feet. And for certain, some things are just not worth to be chased.

Tired is a mentality.

jamiel
aku menunggumu

Word Play

Didn't realize that word play could have an impact on me.

Today, Haida tried my Chocolate handphone while we were having supper with the Bangsawan team. She didn't know it was touch screen and was wondering why it didn't go to menu screen whe she pressed it. Well Haida, now you know.

jamiel
i like to ride horses

She's Blind

Lulu Tobing, you're the only one who can really take my breathe away. You're the first.

jamiel
crushed

Mental Marathon

Test of human endurance. I constantly stretch myself on how far I can go. Just yesterday, as it started to pour on the freeway, instead of stopping below the flyover, I braved the rain. Well, what's the point of staying under the flyover anyway, you'll still freeze. Might as well just keep on moving, who knows, the rain might just stop. And it did.

I remember these moments more. They are real. Shivered I did but I lived to see how far I can push myself. Sounds crazy? Yeah to most if you don't understand.

jamiel
i aint no goldfish. i do sleep.

Sleepless in Singapore

Wanted to tell you guys about Doha. I ain't going there. Don't get me wrong. I ALMOST accidentally got sent there. Remember I went to Jakarta. Well, the freaking flight was at 3am, Jakarta time. I didn't have enough sleep from all the recording and singing. So once I got onto the plane, I covered myself with the Qatar Air blanket, and slept. I wanted to have a pieceful 1 hour sleep but got annoyed instead 3 times by the Indian flight steward.

First time,
FS: "Excuse me sir?"
Jamiel removed his blanket from his head.

FS: "Would you like to have your dinner?"

Stared at the food in front. Dinner? More like confused supper.

Ate and slept again.

2nd time,

FS: "Excuse me sir.:
Removed my blanket again.

FS: Please straighten your seat. We're landing soon"
Jamiel straightened his seat and went back to sleep. Tsk.

3rd time,

FS: "Sir?"

Jamiel removed his blanket, "Yes?"

FS: "Aren't you supposed to be heading to Singapore?"

Jamiel: "Yes. Why?"

FS: "Well sir, we're heading for Doha now. We've already landed in Singapore."

SHIT!

I rushed to grab my guitar and belongings. Didn't want to be a Sheikh for the wrong reasons.

jamiel
al jamielle

Maestro

Listening to a metronome at 137.

I hate recording.

jamiel
mono in stereo

Vet me

Hectic day today. Felt like a punching bag. Been walking around school to fetch students and to do some troubleshooting. My RGB cable wasn't working and that already spoiled my whole day. My materials were all on my laptop.Without it, it's like sending me to Iraq with a parang. Tried my best to hold the fort. Luckily I came up unscathed.

One aunty thought I was the hairstylist who came to teach the students there until she saw me at the pantry.

"Oh! I thought you were the hairstylist."

-_______-

right....

anyways, long weekend reserved for music. lots of work...

jamiel
i am tired and Attan is sick.... i'm worried

Dr Jekyll and Mr Jamiel

It's hard to take on 2 pesonas at one go. It is very challenging.

Music Teacher.

When I become a teacher, I change into this fierce, non-smiling entity where my job is to maintain discipline and be a firm figure. Teaching is my main objective and it is not about being a popular teacher in school. I don't need that and I don't want it. What's more important is that these kids learn values. Only a firm figure can drive certain things through their thick skull.

On the other hand, teaching music requires somebody who is expressive and less firm. I want to be this figure but it proves to be a very tricky task. Been trying to cope with it. We'll see how I progress.

Been painstakingly trying to get inspirations to write my new materials. That is already one hell of a task. I don't get inspired easily but when I do, DON'T disturb me. I won't eat, shower, drink and sleep until it is done. I have already got one melody in my head. I just hope I don't procrastinate too much.

jamiel
things are getting a lil sketchy

Mai Peekcher

"Good morning"


"Hi..."


"Silence in the morning calms me"


"Let's go home"


"My heart"


"Look at me"


Overseas clouds just captures my heart and emotion. Blessed.


"She glanced at me"


"Deep"


"Whisper in my ear"


"Listen to me"


"Down with fever"


"Lochness"


"Light beyond everybody's trouble, always"


"I'll come back again"


"Transition"

Clouds,
Where we float when love sets in,
Rains feelings of blues and greens,
Uncertain of its consequent actions,
As we drift to a higher grounds
We sometimes get too heavy with contents
That we rain till we evaporate...

jamiel
there's no orange juice without pressure. i shall be that orange juice.

How much?

4 days of solid work. Jakarta is the land for pollution, traffic jams and long taxi rides.100,000 rupiah for a taxi ride from where we stayed to our recording studio. I nearly got hit by a muther#*(#! truck when I took a bajai, similar to Thailand's Tuktuk. It tried to squeeze its way through when the oncoming giant tried to shift into the other lane. I could have been pancake by then. Just pour syrup on melah like that.

Didn't manage to get sufficient sleep. Most of our time were spent on waiting for individual musicians to play their instruments. ME, being the vocalist, will be the last to take part in this experimental demo. I managed to rearrange the parts again to make it sound jazzy instead of a straight four. In short, I try not to make it sound boring and monotone.

No time for shopping. Bloody hell, I was in Jakarta man! What to do... Sacrifices. Nad, they got sell cheap stuff you know! What a waste... You guys should check out Indonesia man. Wait a minute, on second thought, better not unless you know somebody there or the place well. It's not really 'Thai-friendly' if you get what I mean. They have not made it a place for easy access for foreigners in terms of moving around and shopping.

I nearly got sent to Doha. I shall update that soon because right now, I want to sleep. You guys get good rests aight. Peace.

jamiel
i wrote something for you

Naked flame

Dear friends, yours truly will be away in Indonesia till Monday. I really don't know what's in store but hopefully, things will be as what I predicted. So far so good. Have a good long weekend you guys. Don't forget to spend time with the family.

Happy National Day to everyone.

jamiel
cisum si efil

Spider Pig

So, what's new for Mr Jamiel as of late. You ain't gonna believe what I'm about to tell you. Today's happening was a little hard to belief. I guess things like this do happen.

This morning, I was awakened by my mom's call. She said that my sis got into detention because of some Friendster misunderstanding. Because of that, I was forced to reject my relief teaching stint at Yew Tee Primary School. I was a little bummed because of that but whatever it is, family first.



Her detention was from morning till 4.30pm. Well, that was what my mom said. I decided to let her enjoy detention while I enjoy my lunch with Shaiful at NIE. Didn't realize that it was first day of school for everybody. HAPPY FIRST DAY!!! =_=

Anyways, met some friends who are doing their Post Grad in NIE. Good luck to you guys. Hope you are able to withstand the pressure of teaching once you graduate. As what John Meyer said, "Welcome to the real world..."



Once my chicken rice and fish and chip rendezvous was over, I went back home to change into my "teacher's" outfit. I wanted to look fierce when I go into the room and reprimand my sis. When I was in the General Office, to my dismay, Mr Justin, the discipline master told me that the students had already been dismissed at 4pm. I told Mr Justin that he should have kept my sister longer in there. Don't start telling me that I'm a sadist. Hello, wake up your ideas,sometimes in life, you have to learn things that hard way. Mr Justin was quite surprised by my words. He didn't see that coming because there was a couple who came down and complained to him why their daughter was sent for detention. I think Mr Justin knew from our brief conversation that I am a man who is very particular about discipline.

Me and Mr Justin shared similar thoughts on the most effective to raise a child is through both parent-teacher support. Without this, the child will have plenty of distractions that could hinder his/her maximal progress.

Since I was already in her school, I guess it would be better off if I get the chance to talk to her form teacher. While Mr Justin tried to contact My Phillip, something just triggered me to ask for a relief teaching position at my sister's school. So I took a piece of paper and wrote the necessary details. Mr Justin saw me scribbling and asked what I was writing. When he got to know that I was applying for relief, he looked happy. Weird. He said that the school needed people like me. People like me? He explained that they needed someone who has the same calibre as a DM, short for Discipline Master. Right...

And so, Mr Justin grabbed the HOD for Science and introduced me to him, telling him that I was applying to be a relief teacher there. The next question blew me away. Get ready for this. He asked,

"Can you teach Music?"

I was dumbfounded. Never have I been asked such a question. I was expecting," Can you teach English?" or "Can you commit long term?"

NOOOOO!!! He asked the bonus question. It was a blessing in disguise. The best thing about teaching music is that, THERE IS NO SYLLABUS!!! I just teach them based on what I deem is good for a music class such as watch MTV, watch video clips, how music is being used in commercials, writing songs, lyrics, performing and etc. Free and easy but of course, I have to start preparing my classes from now on.

Truly blessing in disguise. I didn't scold my sister because she explained to mom that she wasn't at fault in that incident. The only thing that she doesn't know is that,


Mr Jamiel is coming to teach tomorrow. I'm gonna turn this school into a School Of Rock.

jamiel
\m/

Territorial Pee

I don't know what I'll do without my camera. It exudes feelings. My feelings at least, that's the more important issue. What's the most recent happenings? I busked again for charity.



Busking with the ladies, Shermeen and Syltra made me really happy. They bring in the element of fun in busking. Shermeen is having a good start busking with me and Syl. She's learning fast.

We were trying to raise funds for the Singapore Action Group for the Elderly and the Singapore Association for the Visually Handicapped. Tough crowd. Really. The demographics didn't work to our advantage. I didn't have sufficient ammunition to entertain the grey population. They were really domineering. One asked, "You in Chinatown, why never sing Chinese songs?"
I took my microphone and let everybody in Chinatown hear what I have to say.

"Yes, we are in Chinatown but that doesn't mean there are ONLY Chinese in Chinatown. We also have Malays and Indians. That's why we sing English songs." I was literally trying to commit suicide. I was not only intruding their territory, I MADE a statement. Good thing the cobblers didn't pelt me away with their rubber soles. Who cares. Really. I didn't.



It's really tough to hold the crowd if you're not prepared for situations like this. At least this kid made my day. She kept on dancing and dancing to some of our tunes.



I think I have to start recording my performances. For memories sake. This was at Smith Street, smack in the middle of a junction. One funny story first. Try and imagine this in your mind.

We just finished one song by Bryan Adams, Everything I Do, I Do It For You when this malay uncle. long grey hair came up to us. He looked like a rocker from his cowboy dressing. He said in his deep growly voice.

"Gang, lu main baik lah! Abang nak request lagu." Translated, "Boy, you play well lah! Abang want to request a song."

I asked, "Lagu apa? Bon Jovi? Bryan Adams?"

He replied, "Tak, lagu When You Say Nothing At All. You know or not?"

-____-

Tears of disbelief trickled down my face that was trying my best to contain my laughter.

Rocker asking for Ronan Keating. Who says rockers are not setimental. They have feelings too ok!

Ok then, enjoy the clip. Btw, pray that I get the job to play 4 times a week at a new bar. That would be doped.

jamiel
cheenah meenah

Room mate

Sometimes when I'm home, I feel a little stressed up having to start clearing bills, do the chores, getting nagged by parents. When moments like that happens, I turn to my iPhoto library and look through the old photos of Thailand.



My final moments with my room. I have a strong bond with my room. It taught me values and show a side of me that I've never seen before or ever thought possible. Leaving it was hard.






I used to put my coins and kettle there.







Fated to have this number.



The final rent payment.



The lady on my right was my housekeeper. She couldn't speak much English. We had a tough time trying to understand each other in the very beginning.



Living the life of a rock and roll star. Everything just chuck into the trolley and we're on our way to my new condo! Free! Courtesy of my Thai friend, Woo.



My balcony view at night.



The greatest morning view ever.



My friend. He just stands there. He doesn't eat too. He just like to dress cool.



To the hospital the next day. Why?



Check my toes. One of these toes ain't looking right.



Yup, the doctor said it's not a fracture nor is it broken. So what is it?! He said I don't have to straighten it because no one will see my toes. BUT I WANT TO SEE MY TOES STRAIGHT MAN!!! It's bloody challening when you are in a foriegn land and wish to seek medical attention. Nobody can understand simple English.


Trying to set off my life on the right foot. There are still so many stuff to blog about from Thailand but most of my time is spent on music.

Shall blog about Chinatown tomorrow. For now, I miss my old room. By the way, in Singapore, I sleep in the living room with a sleeping bag.

jamiel
dirtbag

Epiphany

The new me. 4 more months to go. Let's go miel.

Today's prep talk was truly much needed. Need to find my tone soon.

jamiel
blackout